Trip and Fall
by QuirkQuirk
Summary: Remus is in the bad habit of falling… in more ways than one. Luckily, Sirius is there to catch him. Sirius/Remus. Oneshot.


**Author's Notes:** So… Winter is a very Harry Potter-y time for me, and nothing is cuddlier or cozier than some good old fashioned Sirius/Remus! They just feel so great, this time of year! I started writing this a while back for my friend Katie, and recently, in preparation for Christmas, pulled it back out and started working on it again… it ended up coming out a bit longer than I expected, so I figured I'd share it with everyone, as I haven't posted anything here in about forever and a half, and because 'tis the season, and because I am a terrible person who has until now not posted ANYTHING in the Harry Potter section! This is only the beginning of what I hope will be a more dedicated contribution to my favourite fandom…

**The disclaimer! **Contrary to popular belief, I am not J. K. Rowling. I know, I was surprised when I found out too. So gee, I guess I don't own the rights to anything. Bummer. Please don't sue me – I'm just having fun.

**Pairing(s):** Sirius/Remus, mentions of onesided James/Lily

**Summary:** Remus is in the bad habit of falling… in more ways than one. Luckily Sirius is there to catch him. Sirius/Remus. Oneshot. COMPLETE.

**Warnings:** Uh… not much to speak of, unless you want to count boys being all snoogly with eachother, which is more of an invitation than a warning. XD Other than that, a bit of scattered profanity, and a wee smidge of underage drinking.

**Dedication:** To my Katie, who continues to be one of my nearest and dearest friends, even though we live so far apart on our opposite coasts, and who loves Sirius/Remus.

**Other stuff: **The songs I listened to while creating this fic, in case you are interested, are "If My Heart Was A House" by Owl City, "Hair" by Ashley Tisdale, and "Animal" by Neon Trees. Not overly important to know, but you can see hints of their influence if you read closely!

**.o.O.o.**

**Trip and Fall**

**.o.O.o.**

Remus doesn't remember exactly how it happened – the precise order of events that led to their meeting and eventual friendship and Maraudership – but he knows that he tripped. Quite literally. Head over heels, stumbling over his own two feet, an inch from faceplanting into the hard cement of Platform 9 3/4 … but the impact never came.

Gasping for breath, he was dizzily set down on the rough surface that he had so nearly come into much harsher contact with, and he looked up to see who had caught him. At first all he could see was sky, and his head was still spinning a bit, so as he looked up at the vast expanse of blue, it felt almost as though he was falling through it. He reeled a bit at the sensation… and then, suddenly, there was a face.

"Hey!" said the face. It loomed over Remus, and he couldn't help but notice that it was a rather nice face… a boy's face, with dark, shaggy hair and a brilliant smile. "You alright?"

"I'm fine…" Remus replied, brushing a few stray strands of auburn hair out of his eyes to more clearly have a look at the boy standing over him. "Just a bit clumsy, is all. Sorry."

"Sorry?" The other boy repeated, looking amused. "What for?"

"I dunno." Remus replied as he looked away, realizing it had been a rather silly thing to say, but unable to break his habit of over-apologizing.

"Ha, well be more careful, huh?" the boy laughed. "Next time I might not be around to catch you!"

Remus realized he was still sitting on the floor, and brushed himself off, standing. "Thank you for not letting me fall." He said, not quite meeting the other boy's gaze in embarrassment.

"No problem!" came the hearty reply, and Remus couldn't help but look back to him again, smiling a little. "Anyways, train's about to leave, so you better grab your stuff and get going! I've gotta meet up with my best mate James – he's saving us a compartment – but maybe I'll see you at school?"

'_I hope so.' _Remus wanted to say, but feeling as though that would sound a little too desperate, he settled instead for a simple "Yeah, I suppose."

"Great!" the dark haired boy replied, and he really did sound as though he meant it. "See you around, then! And watch out for that pretty little face of yours, it'd be a shame to fall on it!"

Remus couldn't help but smile a little as the boy turned tail and ran back to the train. He had been so worried that going to Hogwarts was going to be intimidating and isolating – he had never had many friends growing up, so knew no one upon admittance – but yet he had already met one friendly person. As he gathered his trunk, lugging it along behind himself as he made to board the train, he couldn't help but feel optimistic. The sun was shining brightly overhead, and it was a brand new day just _full_ of possibilities…

By the time Remus had found an empty compartment, some of his optimism was starting to wear off. As the train lurched forward, speeding him onward to a place he had never been, father away from home than he had though of being, he was struck by how alone he felt. Compartment after compartment was filled with older students who intimidated him, or else groups of younger students who already knew eachother, and Remus had never been very good at plunging into new and unfamiliar social situations.

Eventually though, an unoccupied compartment was found, and he dragged his trunk in, hoisting it up into the storage area above the seats. Glancing around, he wondered what he should do. It was a long train ride until they arrived at the school. He pulled out his brand new wand, and was admiring it when he heard… something. Strange little noises, and they sounded as though they were coming from inside his very compartment.

"Hello?" he ventured.

The sounds increased. They sounded oddly like… snickering?

"Is…" Remus began, feeling stupid for talking to the empty space. "Is someone there?"

Now the sounds were _definitely_ getting louder, and Remus could pinpoint exactly where they were coming from – the far end of the bench opposite his, by the window. He stood up, not sure what to do.

"I'm… I'll just go, then."

As Remus turned to the door, intent on leaving, the snickers broke out into hushed whispers, which quickly escalated into stage-whisper bickering, and just as Remus's hand was on the door handle a voice called out to him.

"Hey wait!"

Startled, Remus turned around, only to see… nothing?

"Hello?" he asked, brows furrowing. Was the Hogwarts Express haunted?

And then, limbs began disentangling themselves out of thin air. Two pairs of sneaker-ed feet, then gangly legs, then hands, then arms, then torsos, then – finally – two pairs of grinning faces, framed by mussed and disheveled hair… one of which was very familiar…

"Why hello again!" the familiar face greeted, and Remus was very confused.

"Wh… where did you guys come from? How did you do that?"

"My dad's invisibility cloak." said the new face. "Been in the family for ages but he one ever uses it anymore, so he passed it down to me! Cool, huh?"

Remus wasn't sure if he was talking about the fact that it had been in the family for ages, or the fact that it had been passed down to him, or the cloak itself, but play on the safe side he decided to answer in regards to the latter.

"Yeah, it's really neat! I've never seen anything like it before." He wanted very much to go over and look at it closer, for now that it had been removed the material of it was tangible, slick and fluid like liquid silver… but he didn't want to intrude.

"Anyways," he continued. "I didn't know anyone was in here, sorry for just coming in like that. I'll be going now."

"Hey!" came a shout, but Remus was already halfway out the door, embarrassed to have stumbled into an occupied compartment like that, even though there was no way he could have known. But before he could close the sliding door behind himself there was a hand latched around his wrist, halting him in place. He turned around, and saw the first boy from earlier on the platform was the one stopping him, wearing a friendly grin.

"You can stay in here with us, you know. S'not a bother! You don't know anyone else, do you?"

Remus was about to point out to the boy that he didn't really even know _him_, but introductions were already being made as the dark haired boy entwined his fingers with Remus's, leading him back to the bench.

"I'm Sirius, Sirius Black, and this is James Potter! We've been mates since pretty much forever. What's your name?"

Blushing slightly in embarrassment at all the attention, Remus still couldn't help but be pleased. "I'm Remus Lupin." He replied. "Thanks for letting me sit with you…"

As he was led to the bench and made to sit down next to Sirius, Remus couldn't help but feel as though everything was too good to be true. Sirius didn't let go of his hand right away when they sat down, and even when he did, they were all still sitting very close together, just like the best of friends.

Remus smiled and fidgeted happily in his seat as the two boys rambled on about this-and-that. He wasn't sure exactly how it had happened, but somehow… he had made friends.

**.o.O.o.**

As time passed, the three boys became inseparable, and before long they had even picked up a fourth member to their little posse – a chubby blonde boy named Peter who was a bit awkward, but fun to have around nonetheless. Remus reveled in the feeling of having friends – growing up his parents had kept him sheltered, due to his, ah, _furry little problem_.

He had, in fact, tried to keep this aspect of his life from his newfound friends as diligently as he could, but there was only so many times that he could go visit his "sick mother" over the full moon every month before they started figuring things out for themselves. They may have been troublemakers, but they weren't stupid. It only took them until sometime midway through second year to fit the pieces together.

Surprisingly, Sirius and James hadn't batted an eye at the discovery of this new side to their friend, and even Peter, who was initially a bit shaken by the revelation, took next to no time to recover and accept that yes, one of the Marauders (as they had come to call themselves) was a werewolf.

But the realization that unsettled Remus the most (in a good or bad way, he still wasn't sure yet) was just how much he had come to depend on his group of friends. Really, truly depend on them, like some sort of lost dog that had been adopted from the pound – and no, the canine association of the reference was not lost on him.

On the one hand, he loved having peers, _friends_, by his side that he could trust and rely on. The feeling of camaraderie was sometimes enough to make his heart swell painfully in his scarred chest, and he was overcome with devotion and loyalty towards the three other boys who went together like… some foursome equivalent of peanut butter and jelly.

But on the other hand… he sometimes felt as though these loyalties and dependences had weakened him in some way. Where he had once been happy to spend hours alone reading books or working on his studies, he now found that these previous, familiar activities no longer made him feel… feel _alive_ like he did with his friends. He rarely ended up in detention with the rest of them, and on the nights where he found himself holed away in Gryffindor tower while the rest of them served out their punishment, he couldn't help but feel very… alone.

He had thought that feeling alone was something he was used to. Something that had been chosen for him the moment he had been bitten all those years ago. He could survive on his own, yes, but he could no longer be content with that, as he had been previous to the Marauders.

After a time, however, Remus came to the decision that maybe this whole friends business was unsettling in the good way. New and exciting and different, and definitely good.

**.o.O.o.**

Sirius circled Remus like a caged dog, never taking his piercing grey eyes off of the slighter boy's amber pair. Back and forth, as if he was the point of a compass and Remus was the centre that kept him from swinging too far out of range, or in the wrong direction.

"You really think you're up to this?" he grinned, and the expression was downright ravenous. It unsettled Remus a bit, but he held his ground.

"I can take it" he replied, and hoped that his voice hadn't come out too shaky.

"Alright then. But don't say I didn't warn you."

Remus opened his mouth to form another half-hearted retort, but before he could even think of what he was going to say, he found himself tackled to the ground. He flailed with all his might, limbs kicking and thrashing, but to no avail. And the _really_ irritating part, the thing that really added insult to injury, was that Sirius was _laughing_.

Frowning, and giving one last desperate struggle, Remus realized that he was fighting a losing battle, and gave up. He went limp, and Sirius immediately pinned him by his shoulders and sat on his hips. "You give up?"

The laughter of James and Peter filtered in, and Remus sighed, sagging. "Yeah, I give up."

"Good show, mate!" James called, slightly out of breath from his enjoyment of the show. "Maybe if someone tries to have at you for real, you'll be saved by his inability to keep from laughing himself silly!"

Remus sighed and rolled his eyes. But couldn't help a slight smile. "Thank you _so_ much for the support, James. It really does mean the world to me."

Sirius chuckled from his perch upon Remus, and ruffled the smaller boy's russet hair. "You'll be alright. We've got your back."

It was their fifth year at Hogwarts, and Remus had just been appointed Prefect of Gryffindor house. As such, it was his duty to patrol the corridors after curfew to make sure no one was out of bed causing trouble at late hours. Of course, the Marauders knew all about what kind of trouble could be stirred up after hours – having initiated and engaged in all sorts of it – and therefore taken it upon themselves to attempt to toughen Remus up a bit. Magic was something that the boy was on more than equal footing with when it came to the rest of his peers, but boys, Muggle and Magical alike, were often prone to lashing out with pure physical force when push came to shove.

However, it seemed as though Remus wasn't the fighting type. He may have had more strength than all of them combined during the full moon when he was a rampaging werewolf, but mild-mannered everyday Remus Lupin he had about as much fight in him as a pet rabbit.

Remus chuckled to himself and looked up to Sirius, who seemed to be enjoying his victory perch, as he still had not gotten off of his vanquished friend. "I really am pathetic, aren't I? What was Dumbledore thinking, making me a prefect? No one respects me, and my best friends are the worst group of troublemakers in school!"

Sirius puffed up his chest. "And proud of it!" he announced, just in case there was any doubt.

Closing his eyes and enjoying the company of his best friends, Remus took a moment to reflect. Sirius especially was the one he clung to, out of all the boys in their group. They were all as close as brothers, but Remus was particularly drawn to Sirius, out of all of them. Maybe it was because Sirius had been the one who had caught him when he fell all that time ago, or maybe it was just his captivating, mischievous, and effortless charm. Whatever it was, Remus was drawn like a moth to the flame. He sometimes wondered if he was being too obvious with his preference, or if he was being a bother in some way for it, but Sirius never said anything, and none of the others seemed to notice (or if they did, they didn't appear to care) so Remus went on admiring Sirius above the others.

And Sirius had been the one to offer to teach Remus to defend himself in a fight. Remus not only looked up to the wild, reckless, friend of his, but he depended on him. He could take care of himself just fine overall, but Sirius was always there to fill in the little cracks whenever he needed. To catch him, just in case he fell.

"Ah, what does it matter anyways?" James said, plopping down beside the two, and Peter was not far behind. "You know we'll just sneak out with you anyway, under the cloak."

"You know I could get you in loads of trouble for that." Remus reminded him, smiling wryly and betraying his attempt at a stern tone.

"Yeah, but you won't!" Peter piped in, looking pleased at the prospect. Then he frowned, looking thoughtful. "You won't, will you?"

Sirius laughed, rolling off of Remus to sprawl next to him in the grass, soaking up the afternoon sun. "Of course he won't. We're Marauders, that would be against the code! No, this is more like… a golden ticket. For us, of course! Hobnobbing with the law… we'll be invincible!"

Remus just smiled and shook his head. He knew he shouldn't be allowing this abuse of his power, but really… he found himself not minding as much as he probably should have. After all, they _were_ Marauders.

**.o.O.o.**

Remus knew better than to expect a quiet beginning to his day as the winter months came on, and the sun began rising earlier in the mornings.

"Son of a _bitch_!" came the sudden, jarring shout from the direction of Sirius's four-poster. Remus jerked awake, and he could tell from the groans of discontent from the other beds in the room, that James and Peter had been just as unpleasantly awoken.

"Padfoot what the hell is _wrong_ with you?" James groaned, and it sounded like his face was in his pillow, from the muffled quality of his voice. "Do you have any idea what time it is?"

"Too damn early for the goddamn _sun_ to be in my face!" came Sirius's growled reply, and Remus could hear him thrashing around in his bed in annoyance. He couldn't help but smile, and accepted the fact that he probably wasn't going to get back to sleep either.

"So you decided it would be a shame to not wake all of us up with you to share in the misery?" he called out.

"It's the fucking _windows_," Sirius growled, completely ignoring Remus's question and acting for all the world as if whoever had invented windows needed _at least _an Unforgivable or two tossed their way. "Who put the mother effing windows in facing out to the _east_?"

"Who _cares_?" Peter moaned, and Remus was sure he was just trying to block everything out and get back to sleep.

"_I_ care!" Sirius replied, sounding vengeful. "Those stupid windows face the sun when it comes up every morning, and _every_ morning the goddamn beams shine right through the seam in my curtains, _right_ into my bloody eyes!"

"So close your curtains better each night." James grumbled, face still obviously in his pillow.

"Or sleep facing the other way" Peter suggested.

"It doesn't matter." Sirius matter-of-factly snapped, and it sounded as though he had finally disentangled himself from the sheets. "It would still find a way to get in. Sneaky bastard, son of a bitch _sun_."

Remus was silently laughing to himself over his friend's blown-out-of-proportion predicament when he was started by his curtains being very suddenly pulled open. It was Sirius, dragging a pillow and a blanket along with him, and he wasted no time in crawling into Remus's bed.

"I… Sirius?" Remus questioned, a little shocked but scooting over nonetheless as his sleep-mussed friend shoved his way in, yanking the curtains shut behind himself with a snap.

"Your bed is the only one that faces west." Sirius mumbled, worming under the blankets and making himself right at home.

It didn't take long for Sirius to get back to sleep, and doubtlessly the others were able to as well, now that his racket had ceased, but Remus wasn't quite sure how to react to suddenly finding himself sharing a bed with Sirius. The boy had no sense of personal space, as he had scooted right flush up against Remus's side. The brunet was used to being physical with his best friends, Sirius especially, because not a day went by that they didn't roughhouse or tussle in one way or another, but this was… different.

But once again, Remus found himself rather _liking_ different, so he settled back down into his blankets, and if he nestled just a little too close to his friend's body, or inhaled just a little deeper than usual to smell Sirius's hair, he certainly couldn't be blamed for it. In his defense, it was a rather small bed to begin with, and now with two occupants, some allowances for personal boundaries had to be made. Also, Sirius smelled good, and he was warm.

Remus wondered why Sirius had claimed that his was the only bed that faced west, when they both certainly knew that James's did as well, but he figured he wouldn't mention it just then.

Or the next few times it happened.

**.o.O.o.**

All of Remus's clothes were starting to smell like Sirius.

Sirius didn't do his laundry nearly as often as he should, and as a result, he would occasionally snag bits and pieces of Remus's wardrobe for himself. The articles of clothing were always just a bit too tight on Sirius' slightly larger frame, and Remus couldn't help but admire the way they clung to Sirius's body much more attractively than they did his own.

He was pretty sure that James and Peter didn't notice the exchange of clothing, and for some reason that realization made Remus blush. Something about sharing clothes was so… intimate, like a thing that boyfriends and girlfriends would do, and he was sure that Sirius never borrowed from anyone else. James's clothes were always a rumbled mess, and Peters would surely be too large. No, it was just Remus's clothes that Sirius nicked, most likely because they were always kept clean and neatly folded.

At first, he had tried to hide it even from Remus, that he was "borrowing", but eventually Sirius had been caught outright, rifling through Remus's trunk, and all he had been able to do was laugh and fess up.

Remus didn't mind so much, but the lingering smell of Sirius that seemed to permeate his clothes even after they had been washed nagged at his senses. It was almost unsettlingly comforting and cozy to have Sirius's scent wrapped around him all day as he attended classes, sat down to meals, and did his homework. He was sure he had been caught more than once at pulling his uniform vest to his face and inhaling deeply.

This morning was a Saturday, and as such, Remus had been free to laze about in bed, reading a book from his bedside table and enjoying the leisure of the day. James was long gone, having woken up early of his very own violation to track down Lily Evans, who seemed to be coming around to his advances. That is, she no longer attempted to hex him if he got too carried away, and even accepted his company during meals or Hogsmede outings for brief periods of time. Peter was also nowhere to be found, most likely having headed down to the Great Hall for breakfast some time ago.

Remus had assumed that Sirius was still sleeping soundlessly, as the curtains around his four-poster were still drawn together, and was therefore startled a bit when the dormitory doors suddenly burst open and said Marauder bustled in, looking excited but guilty of something.

"What did you do?" Remus asked, peeking over his book. He couldn't help but notice that Sirius was wearing one of his shirts again today, the sleeves pushed up stylishly, to hide that they were a bit too short for him.

"Nothing at all, dear Moony! Good morning to you too!" he proclaimed, pretending to be offended at the accusation. "But, ah, if anyone asks, I've been sleeping in all morning. Haven't even left the tower, got it?"

Remus shook his head in resignation. He was sure that whatever Sirius did would come back to bite him in the end, but until that time he would stick to Sirius's story, as transparently false and flimsy as it was.

"But why are _you_ still cooped up in here, eh? I thought you were more of an early riser than that." Sirius asked, flopping down on the foot of Remus's bed.

"Oh, well…" Remus began, cheeks flushing slightly. "I sort of _had_ thought you were still asleep. Your curtains are shut and I never heard you get up this morning. I was waiting up for you."

Sirius grinned. "Were you really? Why Moony, you _do_ care!"

Remus rolled his eyes. "Or maybe last time you threw such a snit when everyone else got up and began their days before noon on a weekend and left you _'abandoned and broken-hearted'_ I figured I'd stick around until you were up, to avoid any more abandonment issues from arising."

Sirius lunged forward and cuffed him on the shoulder, but he was grinning. "You prat, you wouldn't have liked it either if everyone just up and left!"

Remus couldn't help but quirk and eyebrow at this. "Oh? I'm pretty sure that is exactly what happened this morning without my knowing it, but my fragile emotional state seems to be fully intact."

This time he was quick enough to dodge the friendly punch that Sirius slung his way, but was not able to disentangle himself from the sheets quickly enough to escape Sirius's full scale launch, which left Remus pinned and gasping for breath as he was mercilessly tickled. In the back of his mind he thought that they were probably too old for such childish antics, but he enjoyed the attention nevertheless.

A few minutes later they both collapsed in a heap, and Remus figured it was probably about time to get out of bed. Pushing Sirius off of him and heading for the showers, he quickly went through his morning routine, berated by Sirius yelling at him to hurry up the whole time.

When he came back into the room, a fluffy towel wrapped around his waist, he found Sirius laying on his bed, leafing through the book he had left there.

"I'll never understand why you waste so much time reading." The dark haired boy commented, and Remus snorted in amusement.

"Just because some of us know how doesn't mean you have to get so bitter and jealous, Pads."

"Ha, ha, ha." Came the sarcastic response, and Sirius looked him over briefly before going back to skimming the pages, trying to understand what all the fuss was about.

Remus suddenly became very aware of the fact that he was very nearly naked. He had certainly been around Sirius in greater states of undress than this before, but they had never been _alone_… always before the others had been around, in the setting of the showers or a swim in the lake. Somewhat irrationally self-conscious, Remus quickly went about gathering up some clothes.

"Ah, Sirius, have you seen my favorite vest? The one with the hem stitchings?" he asked, hurriedly pulling on a pair of underwear under his towel.

"I dunno, I think I'm wearing it." Sirius absently answered. Remus sighed in exasperation and went about finding another.

He was nearly dressed when Sirius finally spoke again, in an oddly sober tone. "Do you mind?"

Remus looked up quizzically, synching his belt buckle. "Do I mind what?"

"That I'm wearing your vest." Sirius clarified. "That I borrow your clothes all the time."

Remus faltered, caught off guard by this new, serious Sirius. "I, no, it's alright." He replied.

"You sure?" Sirius questioned, giving him a once over as if he would be able to tell if Remus was lying, just from looking at him.

Remus shifted nervously, straightening his tie. "Yeah, I'm sure. I like it when you're in my clothes."

As soon as he'd said it he realized how stupid and weird it sounded, and wished he could take it back, or at least that the floor would open up and swallow him whole. Sirius looked at him oddly for a moment, before shrugging, seemingly accepting the awkward explanation.

"Alright, good."

Grabbing his wand from his bedside table, Remus hastened to get out of the room as quickly as possible, to escape the awkward tension. "Come on, let's go see what the others are up to." He called to Sirius as he left the room, face flaming.

He heard Sirius scrambling after him when he was already halfway down the stairs to the Common Room, and as he turned to look behind him he watched in horror as Sirius tripped over the first few stairs, arms flailing to balance himself as he pitched forward.

Heart pounding, Remus raced back up the stairs in twos and threes at a time, seizing Sirius around the waist to keep him from falling. He must have overdone it, because they fell instead in the opposite direction, landing in a heap on the landing at the top of the stairs.

"Are you okay?" Remus quickly inquired, eyes searching his friend's face for any signs of pain. Other than looking slightly out of breath, Sirius seemed fine, and he gazed up at Remus with a searching gaze and a lopsided smile.

"You saved me!" He gushed dramatically, looking so honest and ruffled that Remus's heart flopped.

"I… yeah. I guess we're even now, eh?" he nervously replied, trying to push himself up, but finding himself trapped by Sirius's hands around his waist. He fought back a blush, realizing that he could feel every inch of Sirius's body pressed against his own.

"Yeah, I guess we are. Fancy that." Sirius replied with a grin. "Never thought I'd see the day. Thanks."

Sirius leaned up, much too close, and Remus's eyes widened in apprehension and confusion. He opened his mouth to speak, but before he could figure out what he was going to say it was all over – Sirius had pressed a kiss to the corner of Remus's lips, and was already moving out from under the boy to stand and continue down the stairs.

It took Remus a minute to remember to get to his feet and follow after his friend. Sirius was grinning and holding the portrait open for him, and Remus weakly smiled back, but he was very, very confused.

What the hell had just happened?

**.o.O.o.**

Remus had become hypersensitive to Sirius's touch.

Obviously the… the _mouth to face_ incident had been a fluke, simply another instance of Sirius messing around with no regard to social boundaries or awkwardness, but Remus couldn't stop thinking about it. Now, he was noticing every single time that Sirius touched him in one way or another, and maybe it was just because he had never really paid attention before, but it seemed like Sirius touched him a _lot_.

Remus had started to categorize the touches. There were the "necessary and understandable" touches – things like brushing dirt off of hard to reach areas on robes after Herbology, or fingers touching when passing quills or books to one another in class. Then there were the "unnecessary but understandable" touches… things like friendly jostling at a Quidditch match, or high-fiving after a successful prank.

And then there were "no reason" touches.

Sometimes when Sirius was sitting next to him on the couch, his arm would be casually draped over Remus's shoulder; barely even touching him except for fingers lightly playing on his opposite shoulder. Or occasionally Sirius would poke the brunet's nose, just to see Remus pull back and stutter at the absurdity. But most of all, Sirius liked to play with his hair.

Sirius liked to mess up Remus's appearance. He apparently deemed it too proper and unMarauder-like when Remus's shirt was tucked in, or his tie was straight and tightly synched, but the number one offender seemed to be Remus's hair. He liked to keep it combed into his face a bit, and neat in the back. Sirius liked it to be mussed out of his face and sticking up absurdly in the back. "I don't get how you can see where you're going with that fringe, and don't try to tell me it's not irritating to have it tickling the back of your neck all the time like that" he would remark, by way of justification.

Remus, embarrassingly enough, came to find that as irritating as it was to have his hair and clothes misarranged, he rather liked the actual act of them becoming so. Sirius' hands would linger on Remus' throat as they loosened his tie, or occasionally brush the skin of his stomach when un-tucking a shirt… and Sirius's nails never failed to scrape soothingly over Remus' scalp when he mussed up his hair, and occasionally his fingers would tangle and tug gently in the dark honey locks.

And so Remus found himself going out of his way to make his appearance as pristine as possible when he got showered and dressed in the mornings, so that Sirius would have more to mess up. It was weird, and he felt like an idiot for doing it, but he figured it would be even weirder to _ask_ Sirius to touch him. He wasn't sure why he craved the physical attention so much now, but he knew how to get it, so he tried not to figure it out too much.

"Hey, you coming?" came a voice from the door, and Remus started a bit in surprise.

"James!" he admonished. "Don't sneak up like that, you scared the crap out of me!"

James rolled his eyes. "I'm not sneaking. You're the one spending an hour obsessing over making your tie perfect. Who cares? No one's going to see it under your scarf anyways, and check-out for Hogsmeade is going to start any minute now – the last thing we need is to be stuck behind a bunch of idiot third years. Besides that, we're going to lose track of Lily if we don't get going soon. Come _on_!"

Embarrassed to have been caught spending extra time on his appearance, even if James had no idea why he was doing it, Remus grabbed his robe and scarf and hurried along after his friend.

It was a crisp January mid-morning, and the Marauders were looking forward to a trip into Hogsmeade. James and Sirius were itching to refill their dwindling Zonko's stash, Peter was looking forward to stocking up on sweets in Honeydukes, and Remus… Remus just wanted to spend some time with his friends, and maybe get a new book or quill while he was at it.

"Where've you been?" Sirius asked Remus, as soon as he and James made their way out into the snowy courtyard where Sirius and Peter were waiting. James and Peter rushed ahead to the line, but Sirius held Remus up, accosting him with a disgusted look on his face. "And why's your hair all combed back like that? We Marauders have an image to uphold, dear Moony!"

As expected, Sirius reached forward, mussing Remus's neatly combed hair so that it fell about his shoulders and face. Remus flushed at the attention, but figured that if anyone noticed, he could simply attribute it to the cold air.

"Hey lovebirds!" James shouted at them as Sirius's cold fingers brushed the skin of Remus' hips as his shirt was pulled out. "Hurry up, or we're going to lose our place in line!"

Remus felt his jaw drop at the 'lovebird' joke, but snapped it closed as quickly as he could. It really was obvious, wasn't it, that things between him and Sirius were weird? James had noticed, and gone and pointed it out, and now Sirius was going to realize and make a joke of it and never touch Remus again, and that was going to _hurt_. His heart beating too-quickly in his chest, Remus risked a glance at Sirius to gage his reaction. But where he had expected to see shock or disgust at the implications, Remus only saw a challenging grin.

"Jealous much?" Sirius shot back at James (who rolled his eyes and went back to pushing in line towards Lily), before turning and bumping shoulders with Remus conspiratorially. Remus half-smiled back, nervously, and stuttered out a little laugh, too amazed at how smoothly Sirius was handling the situation to cover his embarrassment.

"Come on, Moony." He urged, linking arms and pulling the slighter boy onwards to join the group. "He's only kidding."

"I know that." Remus muttered back, looking down to cover his blush.

Of course it was a joke. Everything was always a joke, with them. Remus's heart sunk in light of this crushing his hopes that the "accidental" touchings and teasings had held something more, something closer, but at least the touching and teasing had not been dashed out of existence entirely by things being taken seriously.

"There you two are." Peter piped up, diminutive among the rest of the gathered students who all stood at least a fair few inches taller. "Late to the party because you were too busy feeling each other up and having a snog?"

Remus blanched. So much for not taking things too seriously. Peter had always had the unfortunate tendency to carry a joke a bit too far for comfort, and this was no exception. Even James, proprietor of the theme of the moment, looked a bit taken aback.

The gig really was up this time, Remus realized, and went to unwind his arm from Sirius', only to find himself pulled flush up against Sirius's side, the arm that had been linked with his slithering instead around his waist, holding him tight.

"So what if we were, Peter?" Sirius shot back in a defiant tone. "What's it to you if our hot passionate snogging got us so flustered and bothered that we ended up a bit late?"

The blonde cringed, pulling himself into a submissive body language – he knew a reprimand when he heard one. "I… I was only joking, Sirius." He said, a sheepish smile begging for forgiveness. "It's not like… not as though you're really…"

"Well it's not a very funny thing to joke about." James cut in, seeming to have forgotten that he started it.

The queue started moving then, calling the discussion to an end, but Sirius didn't remove his arm from around Remus' waist as they moved forward and were checked off, dispersing in groups as they were let through the gates.

"You don't have to…" Remus said in an undertone, looking up at Sirius. He trailed off, not sure what Sirius didn't have to do – defend him, defend _them_, keep holding him tightly to his side – but wanting to avoid any further embarrassment.

"Yes I very well did." Sirius replied, glancing quickly to James who was hurrying ahead, and to Peter who was purposefully keeping his distance from them, before looking back directly to Remus. "James was being a prat, but Peter was just plain rude, and sometimes it's our superior Marauder duty to put the little rat in his place."

He was grinning reassuringly, and Remus found it contagious. His heart swelled at Sirius' devotion and continued closeness, and he let out a relieved sigh that he hadn't even realized he'd been holding. Of course nothing was weird – they were just being friends. Maybe not something as boldly claimed as Sirius and James' official best-mates status, but something quieter and more secretive that Remus liked, and was glad to be able to hold on to despite what anyone else might have thought of it.

"Besides." Sirius continued, shaking himself a bit to rearrange his robes, but still not letting go of Remus. "Why should they care? We can do bully well whatever we please, and it's none of their business."

Remus had to look away to hide the grin on his face, for he was sure it was big enough to make him look absolutely, stupidly smitten.

**.o.O.o.**

He could always feel the full moon's approach, but usually he could handle its effects over him with much more control.

Remus had come to terms with the fact that he maybe… sort of… _possibly_, might have a crush on Sirius. Which, he supposed, he was fine with, because it didn't make him ashamed of himself necessarily, just a bit embarrassed whenever he was in contact with said crush. Which was often. No, he wasn't ashamed because he was mature enough to accept himself, and sure enough in his friends that he knew they would accept him too, whoever or however he was.

But he was absolutely at his wits end.

Sirius, undeterred by the continuing "lovebird"-themed jokes that still continued to crop up from time to time (mostly by James, but occasionally by Peter when he was feeling brave) had done anything but cut off the touching and dubious flirting – if anything, he had increased them. Remus wasn't sure why, and he surely enjoyed the attention, but this month's approaching full moon was heightening his senses to the breaking point, and he felt like a ticking timebomb just waiting to go off at any moment.

He had started noticing how roguishly handsome his friend was. Remus had of course _started_ appreciating Sirius's physique when he had started the whole clothes-borrowing nonsense, but he now found himself in all new depths of looking upon his friend in a new light. If it wasn't enough that Sirius was fit, he was also devilishly handsome in the face with his well-bred features and light-eyes and dark hair drawing attention and complimenting eachother perfectly. He moved in a way that was almost thoughtlessly seductive, and he always sprawled, never laid or sat, so that his whole body was on magnificent display, even in leisure.

Sirius's voice, rough and deeply boyish, commanded Remus' undivided attention. His barking laughter filled whole rooms; his conspiratorial tones wrapped Remus in blankets of camaraderie; his biting sarcasm, even at its most derisive, evoked a snicker or a laugh; and on the occasions when Sirius spoke to him in his serious voice, or heaven forbid any sort of undertone, Remus felt shivers go down his spine, threatening to make him come undone.

His voice was almost always accompanied by touching, these days. Long gone were the times of casual brushes and occasional elbow nudging – almost every time Sirius interacted with Remus, Sirius was touching him. An arm thrown around his shoulders, leaning into Remus' from behind to look over homework, settling his head in Remus' lap when they all sat squashed around the fireside with not enough room to go around. There had been a few more mouth-to-face incidents involving Sirius's lips to Remus' cheek or the top of his head, and those left him so giddy he could hardly form coherent sentences for the following quarter hour after they happened. Remus even found himself feeling slightly strange at nights when he was alone in his bed with no one else touching him for hours on end, so he had taken to sleeping with extra pillows to replicate the feeling of being coddled.

Infuriatingly, Sirius always _smelled_ good. Remus did not make a habit of identifying and categorizing his friends' smells, but it was always something in the background as an identifying feature… except not it was in the bold forefront when it came to Sirius. He smelled of some musky, masculine shower product, laundry detergent from Remus' borrowed clothes, grass from the time spent outdoors on the grounds, and something uniquely _Sirius_ that Remus couldn't get enough of.

But the worst of his senses, ironically, was the one that was not being fulfilled – his sense of taste. Remus embarrassed himself even thinking about it, but he couldn't help from biting his lips and pressing his tongue desperately to the roof of his mouth whenever Sirius was looking exceptionally delectable, or when he exposed any more skin than normal. Remus positively _ached_ to be kissed, or to be allowed to press his lips to Sirius' neck or shoulders or arms or stomach or… he didn't dare let himself imagine any further.

In fact, when Remus really thought about it, it may not have even been the full moon causing such sensory stirrings, but that was the most convenient excuse that Remus was clinging to, in order to retain even a modicum of self-respect for himself.

As the days counted down, and the Marauders started planning their month's Animagus adventures on the grounds, Remus became increasingly nervous and fidgety. All of the secret plotting meant extra time in close proximity to Sirius, and Sirius seemed to be picking up on Remus's nerves, because he had taken to asserting himself to Remus's side ever more than usual. Comforting though he thought he was being, Sirius' method of aide was doing the exact opposite of what he had certainly been intending, and after a few near misses wherein Remus had caught himself pulling away from being conspicuously close to Sirius' jawline or neck, he had decided to take affirmative action and cut himself off from temptation.

However, cutting himself off proved more difficult that he had initially thought it would have been. Sirius was absolutely _everywhere_, and Remus had eventually taken to avoiding him and the rest of the Marauders entirely for the remainder of the week by haunting the library or locking himself away in his rooms. He could tell that they were all confused and probably hurt by his avoidance, but it was the only way.

However, when the night of the full moon came around, there was no more avoiding them. They hunted him down when he was in the South-East courtyard trying to do some last minute essay or another, and dragged him bodily back into the dormitory, where they proceeded to fill him in on the plans. Sirius, surprisingly, didn't say much, but eyed Remus calculatingly nearly the entire time, so much so that when it came time for Remus to sneak away to the Shrieking shack to await transformation, he was almost relieved.

As always, he lost his body to the wolf that night, but in the part of his mind that remained Remus, he would be able to remember, the next day, filtered images of tumbling with a stag, a rat, and a large black dog, who barked with joy and wouldn't stop licking all over the wolf's furry face, tail wagging.

**.o.O.o.**

The next day, after Remus was released from the hospital wing, he trudged back to the dorms without even entertaining the notion of making it to any of his classes. Usually he would have pushed himself for it, but he knew he would be able to get the notes from Lily on the more than likely off chance that none of the other Marauders managed to scribble any down… and to be honest he just didn't feel like it. Perhaps the moon had indeed had something to do with his emotions over the past week or two, because he was feeling an unusual weariness after this month's transformation. All he wanted to do was crawl in bed and curl up to sleep as the last remnants of his lingering aches and pains faded away, and so that was what he was going to do.

What he wasn't expecting, however, was to find someone already in it.

"S-Sirius?" He stuttered, and the fellow Gryffindor eagerly looked up from the magazine he had propped open in his lap.

"Took you long enough!" Sirius exclaimed, rising to his knees and crawling to the end of Remus's bed, throwing his arms open and tugging Remus into an eager, but gentle, hug. "Are you feeling alright? No offence Moons, but you look like death warmed over."

Remus smiled tiredly, allowing Sirius to guide him into bed and fuss over him. "I feel like it." He admitted.

"I believe it." Sirius reassured him heartily. "If the way you looked hadn't tipped me off, the fact that you're not in class certainly would have."

Remus rolled his eyes, and tried to squash the fluttering of his heart as Sirius tucked him under the duvet and then settled himself down crosslegged at the end of the bed, facing Remus. "Thanks." Remus sarcastically replied. "For constantly reminding me I look like shite. And I, unlike _some people_, can afford to miss class every once in a while."

"Well _some people_," Sirius replied, grinning cheekily "Skive off classes every once in a while to make sure their friends are gonna be okay after, oh, I don't know… a night of rampaging. And you don't look like shite, Moony, you look dashing as ever. Maybe moreso with the rumpled, just-shagged look you have going on."

Remus flushed. "I –" he began, but found he didn't know how to finish. He wanted to defend himself, and remind Sirius that he most certainly had not been _rampaging_, thankyouverymuch, but he was rather stuck on the fact that Sirius had just said he looked dashing and '_just shagged_'.

"Speechless, I see." Sirius remarked, looking smug. "Don't worry, sir, you're hardly the first – I have that effect on people."

Remus smiled despite himself. It was so, _so_ very hard to not be drawn into Sirius' contagious devil-may-care attitude and witty banter. He felt his resolve to separate himself from his, ah, 'Sirius problem' crumble into pieces, and knew that he would never be able to give this up, no matter how frustrating or embarrassing it could ever become. '_Well then here we go again…_' Remus thought to himself, giving into Sirius, who he was sure by now would never be satisfied until he had driven Remus into St. Mungos "certified" ward.

"Remus." Sirius began, and to Remus's surprise he was using his serious voice. His "serious Sirius" voice, as they all liked to joke, but it certainly didn't _feel_ like a joke, with the way Sirius' clear grey eyes were staring him down.

"Hm?" Remus replied, not trusting himself to say any more.

"Are you, you know… alright, or whatever?"

Whatever Remus had been expecting, it hadn't been that. "I'm sorry?"

"Just…" Sirius shifted uncomfortably. "You know I'm no good with all this emotional waffle and wholesome conversation about feelings and whatnot, but you've just seemed so… so _down_ lately, and in case it's not just the full moon I thought I'd, you know… ask."

Remus wiggled with nerves, and squirmed further under the covers. "I… I'm fine."

Sirius fixed him with a hard look. "Mister Moony, you are lying to me, and it is unbecoming." He said in a stern voice. "You are the designated honest and noble member of this Maraudership, and it is your obligation – no, _duty_ – to uphold those most sacred –"

"I get it!" Remus cut in with a laugh, before sobering up with the realization that he was going to have to explain himself… and that Sirius would know if he was lying. "I get it."

Sirius scooted forward, making himself more comfortable, and Remus could feel his body warmth through the covers. "So…?" Sirius prompted.

"How did you know I would come back to the dorm instead of go to class?" Remus asked, stalling for time. Sirius blinked, tilting his head to the side in slight confusion in a very doglike way.

"Because I know you." He said, as if it was obvious.

"But…" Remus countered, frustrated. "Then I guess I still don't understand why you're here. I thought you and James had something planned for Snivellus?"

"Yeah, well." Sirius said with a shrug. "He can figure it out on his onesies. And don't think I don't know you're avoiding my question."

Remus grimaced. "What question was that?" he replied, feigning ignorance. Sometimes Sirius lost track of his own words and train of thought, so maybe Remus would catch a break.

"The one about how I was wondering if you're alright, because you've been acting queer as hell for over a week."

It was useless to avoid it. Remus was just going to have to tell the truth… or some watered down version of it. There was no way he could confess everything, but there was also no way he could lie and risk Sirius prodding even further.

"It's just…" Remus started. "I guess I've been feeling a bit… off."

"Off?" Sirius repeated, sounding confused.

"Well…" Remus struggled to find the right words. "I guess I just… I mean, with everyone so… I mean you and James are best mates and all, and James is going for Lily, and I mean, I guess you could have anyone you wanted, but… and I just…"

He knew he was rambling, and that none of it made any sense, but he was doing his best to convey his sense of awkwardness with being so uncomfortably enamored by Sirius Black, who could have any girl he wanted and would never look twice at shy, overly polite, fumbling Remus. It hurt, to try and put it into words without giving it away, because a part of him wanted very badly to just say it, and maybe doing so would make it go away. Something real was something that could be destroyed, after all. But he refrained, because the inevitable rejection would not only destroy the silly crush, but also possibly the friendship, and his heart.

Sirius reached out, then, placing his hand on Remus' shoulder and leaning over him looking suddenly understanding and apologetic.

"Oh Remmy." He said. "I understand what you're trying to say now."

Remus paled. "You do?"

"Of course." Sirius replied, scooting closer. "I don't know why I didn't see it before. You miss us!"

Remus was so thrown by this pronouncement that he drew back in surprise. "I… what?"

"It's obvious now that I think back about it." Sirius was saying. "With James chasing skirts, and skirts chasing me… I suppose Peter's still about, but we all know he's about as emotionally sensitive as a rock… Oh Moony I have the best idea!"

Remus, who was still very confused as he tried to process this twist of events which both seemed to satisfy Sirius' curiosity, and get Remus off the hook. "Um, what kind of an idea?"

"Tonight, Remus!" Sirius announced, looking delighted. "You'll see! But it's going to be a surprise, so I'm not going to tell you any more no matter how much you beg and plead! Might be able to bribe me though, if you want to try that…"

Sirius was making absolutely no sense, but whatever he was on about, Remus was not going to look a gift hippogriff in the mouth. Let Sirius think whatever he wanted, as long as Remus got to keep his guilty secret another day.

"Well then, Mr. Moony, you had better get some rest! S'what you came back to bed for after all!" Sirius told him, tucking the covers snugly around Remus. "I've got some planning to do, but I will see _you_ later!"

And with that he swept from the room in a flourish, leaving Remus very alone, very confused, and very much still infatuated with his best friend.

**.o.O.o.**

It seemed like only a moment later he was being shaken awake, but Remus knew from the light outside, or lack thereof, it must have been at least a few hours later. It took him a moment to register who was shaking him, but when he saw Sirius' grinning face the afternoon's events came back to him in a rush.

"Siri–"

"Shhh!" Sirius hissed, pressing his fingers to Remus' lips. "The others are asleep, and if they wake up now they'll want to come too."

Remus wrinkled his brows curiously. "We're going somewhere?" he questioned in a whisper.

"Of course we are, what kind of adventure could we possibly have right here?"

Remus looked down, and belatedly noticed that Sirius was practically on top of him, on all fours. Sirius's previous statement reverberated in his head, and he was struck with the wicked images of just what kinds of adventures they _could_ have right there. Fighting down a blush, he looked back to Remus, who was grinning at him expectantly.

"Well come on!" Sirius urged. "Get your shoes and cloak on! Let's go!"

Remus was rushed along out the door, and as soon as they made it outside the common room and into the outside hallway, Remus finally got a look out the windows and was able to gage what time it might have been.

"Sirius, there are stars out… it must be past curfew by now, where are we going?"

"Gonna report me, Mr. Prefect Moony?" Sirius smirked, before reaching out and grabbing Remus by the hand to lead him along. Remus found himself beyond protesting as their warm palms met, and he ached to lace their fingers together. Sirius kept grinning at him conspiratorially as he pulled the slighter boy along through the castle, causing Remus's heart to flop, but as he was led out through a door onto the grounds he found his voice.

"Sirius where are we going? Why didn't you wake the others?"

"Because this is an adventure just for us!" Sirius told him. "And I'm not going to tell you where we're going, because the point of a surprise is for you to not know!"

"Oh." Remus replied, not sure what else to say, but trying to keep from smiling like a lovesick fool.

The cold night air nipped at his cheeks, and Remus shivered lightly, wishing he had thought to bring a heavier coat, or a hat or a scarf or mittens.

"Chilly?" Sirius asked, feeling the shiver travel through their arms. Remus nodded, and Sirius shot him a reassuring smile and squeezed his hand. "It's alright, we'll be there soon."

_There_, turned out to be a side lawn, vaguely overlooking the lake, surrounded lightly by trees. Sirius dropped Remus's hand and stepped in front of him, spreading his arms to indicate the space around them.

"Ta-da!" Sirius exclaimed, looking extremely pleased with himself.

"Uh…" Remus replied, hugging his arms around himself and rubbing them up and down to create some friction. He had been here before on occasion, but there was nothing particularly noteworthy within the area that he could see.

"You don't know where we are?" Sirius asked, smile fading.

"No, I –" Remus hastily replied. "I know where we are, I recognize it, but… I don't really see… anything."

"Come ooooon!" Sirius whined, gesturing imploringly. "You don't remember?"

"I…" Remus tried, but came up blank.

"Remus Lupin, you are an insufferable ponce!" Sirius declared, shaking his head in exasperation. "Not even remembering the place where Moony and Pads had their first romp!"

Startled, Remus look around, indeed spying the Whomping Willow not too far away on the grounds. He was equally surprised that he could have forgotten, and deeply touched that Sirius remembered. He did as well, now, and as it came back to him he smiled – they had exited the shrieking shack, that first night of Animagus adventuring, and once Remus-as-a-werewolf had settled into his new pack, they had run across the lawn in wild, untamed freedom, before Padfoot had tackled Moony into the grass right here, and they'd had their first animal tussle.

"Sirius…" Remus said fondly, hoping that his smile did not come across too smitten.

"Come on, you forgetful wolf, I brought us something."

Sirius led him to sit on the grass, scooting close when Remus shivered at the cold ground. "Here…" he said, shuffling right up to Remus' side, unwinding his scarf from around his neck and wrapping it back around the both of them. Remus was glad for the dark and the cold, because it would cover and excuse the fact that his cheeks were positively _glowing_.

"Alright now, try to keep yourself contained, but wait'll you see what I've smuggled in!" Sirius excitedly forewarned him, shuffling through a bad that Remus hadn't noticed being brought along, that was clinking familiarly…

"Sirius…" Remus scolded, but unable to help a sly smile from coming over his expression. "Where did you get that from? You know we're not allowed…"

Sirius pulled the Firewhiskey out with a flourish, looking extremely proud of himself.

"Oh come on!" Sirius insisted, smirking cheekily as he dangled the bottle out to Remus. "You know you want some…"

"Sirius, I don't know…"

"Live a little, Remus! Come on, for me?"

And of course, for Sirius, Remus would do it. He popped the bottle open, clinking it with Sirius', and took a swig just as Sirius toasted "To us!" Remus nearly choked on his gulp.

They sat a while in silence, but the longer it stretched, and the more Remus thought about it, the more intimate it grew. He was pressed against Sirius, sharing a scarf, out under the stars just the two of them, sipping at smuggled Firewhiskey. He sighed, feeling the familiar restraint and frustration welling up, and Sirius turned to fix him with a look.

"What?"

"Oh, nothing." Remus replied, looking away. "Just… you know. This is really nice. Thanks, Sirius, for doing this."

Sirius rolled his eyes. "You're too sappy, you know that? Always saying sorry and thank you over every little thing."

"I –" Remus began, but stopped, as he realized he was about to apologize, and took another drink of Firewhiskey instead. Sirius smiled knowingly, and Remus smiled embarrassedly. Sirius didn't look away, though, and Remus fidgeted as he began to grow awkward. Sirius was so close, and looking so absolutely gorgeous in the night, and Remus' lips instinctually parted, before he forced them back together. Gods, what an awful person he was, to be thinking thoughts of kissing and holding and… _other things_, about his best friend! There was absolutely no way Sirius would ever feel the same, and although he had never mentioned it specifically, he surely must have noticed how odd Remus became around him.

"Do you think I'm weird?" Remus impulsively asked, cheeks heating as he looked down at his lap and clutched nervously at his bottle.

"Hmm?" Sirius replied. "What'd'you mean? Of course you're weird. We all are."

"No…" Remus insisted, determined to try and explain himself. Out here in the crisp air and under the night sky and with the Firewhisky buzzing through him anything felt possible, and he was unable to help himself from confessions spilling from his lips. "I mean… not in the fun way. I just… I feel awkward and weird and I can't help it, and I suppose you must have noticed, even if you haven't said anything, and I know you said I apologize too much, but I really am sorry for it, and I just –"

"Hey." Sirius interrupted, turning within their scarf wrap to face Remus, setting their drinks. He looked concerned, brows furrowed in confusion and an attempt at understanding, and Remus was too embarrassed to continue, knowing that the confusion and understanding would morph into disgust and refusal if he were to keep letting his mouth run off much further, but Sirius was continuing, keeping any more confessions from escaping. "Listen to me Remus, because I think that you think too much: not everything has to be as complicated as you think it is. We're just here, sitting together, and that's nice and easy, yeah? Nothing to worry about – just us. Just friends."

And there is was. _Just friends_. The two words guaranteed to crush aspiring hopes and dreams, and Remus felt his heart plummet. He was going to cry or yell or tell all his secrets, he just _knew_ it, and he scrambled to get away before any of that could happen, but found his escape thwarted by Sirius's strong arms grabbing out and tugging him into a tight embrace. Sirius was surrounding him, his heat and smell and soothing voice and he hushed comforting nothings to Remus' panicked flailings, and as much as Remus wanted to keep struggling, he couldn't.

"Calm down, Remus, calm down! Shhh, it's okay, what's wrong? I'm right here…"

He _was_ right there, so Remus sagged into Sirius, taking what he could get, and gripped tightly into the front of Sirius' shirt, fighting with his raging emotions which seemed to sense that this was it, the turning point, and all wanted a chance to fight to the surface and become a part of the moment. Sirius pulled Remus closer, rubbing up and down the smaller boy's arms and back, and guiding Remus' face into the crook of his neck.

"I'm sorry." Remus whispered.

"Stop that." Sirius told him gently, petting his hair. "You don't have anything to be sorry about."

"But I –"

"Remus Lupin, you will shut up and listen to me." Sirius firmly insisted, cupping Remus' cheek and pulling his face up so that he could look him directly in the eye. "I know you have a lot of baggage, but whatever issues you have, you need to stop letting them get to you like this. You are one of the best persons I've ever had the pleasure to meet, and you are wonderful, even when you don't think so or it doesn't seem like it. Everything is going to be alright."

The way Sirius said it, with such conviction and reassurance, had Remus believing him. He relaxed in his friend's hold, but rather than taking the cue to let him go, Sirius only scooted him closer, still holding his face so that Remus couldn't look away. Remus's eyes were wide, and he couldn't believe how close they were, how easy it would be to simply lean in just a _little_ bit and…

"Come here."

Sirius's words were lost in Remus's breathless gasp and the rush of white noise that flooded his ears as Sirius wound the hand on Remus's cheek around to the back of his neck, tugging him forward so that their lips met.

Remus was frozen in shock, but Sirius didn't seem to mind, as he wound his fingers into the nape of Remus's hair and applied gentle pressure to their kiss, slanting his lips to fit Remus's perfectly between them. He took Remus's lower lip between his, sucking ever so gently before releasing, letting out a sigh as he pulled back.

He had forgotten how to breathe, Remus was sure. Sirius drew back just far enough so that they could look at each other, and Remus's eyes darted wildly, looking for any trace of a joke or a dream. When none were forthcoming, he released a shaky sigh and silently implored Sirius for an explanation. It couldn't be real, it just _couldn't_…

"You alright?" Sirius was asking, and the question was so ludicrous that Remus could only nod in affirmation. "Good. Because… well, I'm sorry if I assumed, but it seemed the thing to do."

Remus's jaw worked uselessly, trying to find words, but eventually only able to come up with "W-why?"

Sirius smiled in an embarrassed sort of way. "Well because you were asking for it," He explained. "All nervous and close and… stuff. You're not mad, are you?"

Remus was not mad, but he was very, _very_ confused.

"I don't understand…" He said. "Is this a joke, or some sort of… a dare? You don't… you don't like…"

"Well you're wrong." Sirius informed him. "Because I do."

Remus frowned. "But… I don't understand."

Sirius sighed, and rolled his eyes. "Honestly, Moony, I've been grabbing at you for years now, quite obviously for the last few months. I wear your clothes and sneak into your bed, and I tell all those birds who ask me out to Hogsmede to sod off, because I'm going with you. I brought you back to this sappy little clearing in the middle of the night and tried to get you drunk and cuddly. I've been flirting like _mad _for ages. Not to mention I just kissed you. For someone who's supposed to be smart, you sure are dense, Remus."

"But you're not –"

"I'll thank you not to tell me what I am or am not." Sirius said, looking amused and slightly exasperated. "If you tell me not to do it again, I won't, but I'd rather you didn't because I really would like to have another go.

And Remus had no choice but to let Sirius kiss him again, not understanding how he could have missed the signs all along. He had been so caught up in himself that he had forgotten to take into account that Sirius had a say in the matter as well. As Sirius pulled him into another kiss, Remus felt his heart swoop in joyful nerves, and once again felt the familiar sensation of falling. But Sirius was there to catch him. holding him tight, as – Remus realized – he had been from the very start.

**.o.O.o.**

…**the end…**

**.o.O.o.**


End file.
